anxiety + me

to me, anxiety is over analysing everything.

every word that leaves your mouth.

every thought that pops into your head.

every action you carry out.

every message you send.

every reply you don’t receive.

every mistake you’ve made.

anxiety has robbed me of who I used to be.

I am a shadow of my former self and I hate it.

I hate that the smallest thing can instil fear in me, can reduce me to tears.

I hate that I am no longer confident in my own abilties, that I constantly doubt myself and my actions.

I hate that I struggle to talk to people because I worry how I come across, that I would rather stay silent than have a conversation because I overthink every reply, or lack of reply I receive.

I hate that how other people view me is at the forefront of my mind, 24/7.

but

anxiety has made me more empathetic

more compassionate

more loving

more relatable

more open

more focused

more thankful

more adventurous

more motivated

more mindful

more courageous

 

anxiety may have robbed me of my former self, but I will not let it rob me of who I am becoming.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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10 thoughts on “anxiety + me

  1. This is so beautiful, Laura.

    The beginning makes me wish I could colour your shadow but then you describe the person you are becoming and all I can think of is how courageous you are xxx

    • Josh you have such an unbelievable way with words, it’s amazing.

      I don’t feel very courageous but I’ll try my best to be 🙂

      Thanks so much for your constant support, I’m very grateful to have you around xxx

      • I’m sorry, I thought I had replied to this.

        Thank you. I think half of it is waffle(!) but I just try to be clear in what I say; personally, I suspect it comes across pompous but oh well.

        Believe be, you really are. Just try your best. You never need to worrying about not being so, because you have lots of people around you to support you.

        Honestly, you don’t need to say thank you. You have been a constant support to me and I am immeasurably grateful to have you around xxx

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